Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
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