I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
