I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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