Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
