id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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