i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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