his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
