Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
