Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
