I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
