ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
tell me about the eggs
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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