i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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