I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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