I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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