Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
