part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize