I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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