im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
