I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
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