mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize