i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
This baby is an asshole
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize