How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
