Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
We got so high we made milksteak
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize