love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
from now on my penis is your penis
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
