I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
this will be a night to untag.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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