I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
