is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
