its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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