The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize