If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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