Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
