We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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