Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
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