Sry I called you an 8
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
it was like eating out sand paper
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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