soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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