Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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