Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
he thought i was a dude.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Sorry about my life...
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
