ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize
