dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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