It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
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