Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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