Please, let me fuck your mom
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
