They should really pass out barf bags in church
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
this hospital has no fireball
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
