There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
