The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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