He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
