well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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