Michael Bay diarrhea
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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