I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
