38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
