I seem to have left my pride at pride
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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